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How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

July 2014

Written and published almost a century ago, this book is still read and cherished by many today. After reading it, I understood why its popularity stood firm through the ages with 15 million copies sold. It was simple: It held timeless truths about areas we all want to improve in.

It is a great book! It doesn’t have a thrilling storyline or twisted plot with an old-fashioned villain or charming prince with elves by his side but it is a completely different genre.

Communicating effectively, managing personal relationships and developing people skills. I highly recommend this book for those who are motivated to climb the ladder of success. In fact, it’s so good that I would recommend you to buy a copy and read it once every two years!

 

Things I learnt from the book:

The prime interest of adults is health. The second interest is developing skills in human relationship. People yearn to master the technique of getting along and influencing other people.

 

6 ways to make people like you:

  1. Become genuinely interested in other people.
  2. Smile.
  3. A man’s name is the most important word and sound in the world.
  4. Be a good listener. Let others talk about themselves.
  5. Talk in terms of the other person’s interest.
  6. Make the other person feel important and do it sincerely.

 

12 ways of advocating your ideas:

  1. Avoid arguments.
  2. Respect the other person’s opinion. Never tell them they are wrong.
  3. If you are wrong, say it quickly and empathetically.
  4. Begin in a friendly way.
  5. Get the other person to say ‘yes, yes’ immediately.
  6. Let the other person do majority of the talking.
  7. Let the other person feel that the idea is their.
  8. Try honestly to see things form the other person’s point of view.
  9. Be sympathetic of the other person’s thoughts and idea.
  10. Appeal to nobler motives.
  11. Dramatize your idea.
  12. Throw down a challenge.

 

9 ways of challenging without offending:

  1. Begin with praise or honest appreciation.
  2. Call attention to people’s mistake indirectly.
  3. Talk about your own mistakes before criticizing the other person.
  4. Ask questions instead of giving direct answers.
  5. Let the other person save face.
  6. Praise the slightest improvement. Lavish in your praise.
  7. Give the other person a fine reputation to live up to.
  8. Make the fault seem easy to correct.
  9. Make the other person happy about doing the thing you suggest.

 

6 ways to improve general people skills:

  1. Don’t nag.
  2. Don’t try to change the person.
  3. Don’t criticize.
  4. Give honest appreciation.
  5. Pay little attentions.
  6. Be courteous.